


All's Fair in Love and War

by mariposaroja



Category: Formula 1 RPF
Genre: M/M, Prompt Fill, Teenage AU
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-07-31
Updated: 2014-07-31
Packaged: 2018-02-11 05:05:51
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply, Underage
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,010
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2054733
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mariposaroja/pseuds/mariposaroja
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Seb and Jenson have beenfriends forever but recently things seem... different between them. And they soon learn that nothing is ever easy. Especially when you're in love with your best friend</p>
            </blockquote>





	All's Fair in Love and War

**Author's Note:**

> So I've been working on this for just a few months shy of a year and it's finished! FINALLY! Haha  
> Inspired by this prompt on the kinkmeme:  
> "Teenage AU Sebson. Seb and Jenson have been best friends forever but recently things seem... different between them. Major bonus points if they end up having a very confused and awkward make-out session in one of their bedrooms with unsuspecting parents downstairs or in the other room. Cookies if you include other F1 drivers! Would love a long(ish) fic but it's up to filler :)"

There are times when Sebastian finds himself looking back on the day when he and Jenson first met.

This would be one of those times.

They’re in his room sitting on the bed, both trying to outdo each other on Formula 1 13 which is basically what they do every day. The competition is fierce but, more often than not, Seb is the one who comes out on top. They’re stubborn when it comes to racing, that’s for sure. Seb picks Red Bull because he knows that they have the best car and therefore give him a better chance of winning.

Jenson, on the other hand, is McLaren through and through. He stays loyal to his team through thick and thin, refusing to race in anything but a McLaren; even when his friend suggests that maybe he should try a Ferrari. He’s learned to stop asking; Jense rarely reacts well to the strategic advice (McLaren are a team of integrity and if it was good enough for the likes of James Hunt and Aryton Senna, then it is sure as hell enough for him).

It’s this stubbornness that reminds him of how the two came to know each other in the first place. Twelve years ago, when Jenson was a well behaved five year old and Seb a cheeky four year old, they found themselves in the same pre-school class. It was playtime and Sebastian was busy constructing the best sand castle that the world had ever seen in the sand pit. Jenson saw what he was doing and asked if he needed any help. The younger of the two declined and returned to what he was doing. Jenson joined in any way, prompting Seb to thrown a tantrum and order his classmate to go away.

They’ve been friends ever since.

Sometimes Seb can’t believe that they have been friends for twelve years. How could a friendship last that long? Especially since they had been really young and have changed a lot since. It still baffles him but he accepts it anyway. He couldn’t even begin to imagine what his life would be like if it wasn’t for Jenson. Everyone who even remotely knows them also knows that they are a package deal. God forbid the P.E teacher attempted to put them on separate teams for football, even if they do both get the role of captain. After several incidents that are probably best left unmentioned, Mr. Henderson has learned his lesson.

It’s always been Sebastian and Jenson, Jenson and Sebastian.

Until now that is….

“Mum wants to know if you’ll eat mushrooms in your spaghetti bolognese. She’s trying out a new recipe…” Seb casually asked as he routinely took an apex in Monza. He knew that Jense liked mushrooms and his mother did too but she still always made him ask anyway if the was changing the way she cooked anything. God forbid he would have to pick onions off his pizza. Sometimes Seb thought that his mother was more concerned about what Jenson likes that what he himself likes. The older of the two just wanted food, he didn’t care about which form it came in.

It was always a given that if Jenson came over after school, he was staying for dinner and vice versa. This was especially true if it was a special occasion of any kind that involved cake or even leftover cake. Even the potential for a cake was enough for him. He doesn’t discriminate. (Seb distinctly remembers an incident where he showed up at the Vettels’ front door with a cake in hand at one o’ clock in the morning to celebrate the Chinese New Year).

Then Jenson says something that makes Seb go off track and into the tyres, handing his rival a rare win. “Can’t stay for dinner tonight. I’m taking Jessica to the movies.”

The younger boy would have scowled if he wasn’t so taken aback by how cavalier the statement was. “Who’s Jessica?” Sebastian wonders after a moment in a slightly petty voice. He knows full well who she was: the girl who Jenson had fancied since she transferred to their school from Japan when he was thirteen.

Jenson turns to look at his best friend, eyebrows knitted together, distracted from his celebration of victory (it makes Seb feel even better). “Seriously? Jessica; you know, kinda short, long brown hair, brown eyes…”

The smile on his face when Jenson describes her makes Seb feel uncomfortable. He resists the urge to scrunch up his nose and make his distaste know. “Oh, _her_.”

The taller of the two tosses his controller down on the bed. “I know what this is about…”

He does? Because Seb sure doesn’t. All he knows is that he really doesn’t like this Jessica girl. “You do?”

Jenson nods slowly. “You think that we won’t have any time together now that I’m seeing Jess- that we’re going to drift apart. I’m not going to let that happen. We’ve been friends for twelve years, Seb, I’m not going to let anything get in the way of that,” he promises, looking the younger man straight in the eye.

Seb feels something stir in his stomach but is too occupied by other feelings to question it. He swallows the lump that has formed in his throat and gives a brief incline of his head. “Okay.”

 

The next day, it’s Sebastian’s turn to spend the afternoon at Jenson’s. The almost blinding smile that the latter has plastered on his face rarely wavers. It really shouldn’t annoy Seb as much as it does; Jenson has had lots of girlfriends before but it’s the fact that he has been crushing on her for the last four years that makes her different. She’s not like the other girls in looks or personality.

They begin the always mundane task of completing their homework but Seb finds it very hard to concentrate when his best friend keeps looking at him with a grin on his face. He tries to maintain focus but the older boy is proving to be too much of a distraction. 

Seb gives a small huff and rolls his eyes. “You’re going to tell me whether I like it or not so you might as well get it over with.”

Jenson doesn’t need any further encouragement. He quickly embarks on a rant about how it was _the_ best date he’s ever been on. “I let her pick the movie- as the guy always should- and she just so happens to pick the one that I’ve been wanting to see since it was announced! Then-“

“Wait, you went to see the Hobbit with _her_? We were supposed to go together! We _always_ go together!” says an incensed Sebastian.

The older of the two frowns. “She wanted to see it. What was I supposed to do? I don’t mind going to see it again. Besides, it was better than some awful chick flick.”

He wants to argue that that’s not the point but decides to choose his arguments. His big baby blue eyes narrow. “What are you talking about? You love chick flicks. My Big Fat Greek Wedding is your favourite movie…”

“Yeah and if you tell her that I will never speak to you again, as long as I live.” Seb wants to say that that would require him to talk to her and that probably wasn’t going to happen anytime soon.

“Anyway, then…” Jenson continues with his recollection of every detail of the night, right down to what pants he was wearing. Well, Probably. Seb doesn’t know, he stopped listening after about ten seconds. To let on that he was, however, he alternates between nodding, fake smiling and looking shocked at appropriate intervals. When Jenson reaches the end of his story, he pauses for a few seconds. “She’s coming over after school tomorrow if you want to hang out with us; you know, try to get to know her better. I’m sure she’d love that…”

_I’m sure she would._ “I’m not really into doing the whole third wheel thing…”

“You won’t be a third wheel. It’s only natural that I should want to hang out with the girl that I like and my best friend. It’s important that you two get along.”

Seb reluctantly agrees but only because he really needs to get this English essay on the poetry of Sylvia Plath done as quick as possible because, well, it’s draining his soul by the minute.

 

Their little play date with Jessica the following day is nothing short of a disaster. Well, at least from Seb’s point of view it is anyway. Jenson probably considers it to be the greatest success in history but he is seriously lacking perspective. The younger has to admit, that for all intents and purposes, Jessica is a nice girl but a whole lot of good that did Seb. From the minute they step foot inside Jenson’s house, his eyes never stray from his girlfriend.

Okay, so she’s quite pretty but that doesn’t give him the right to completely ignore his best friend. Jenson decides to introduce Jessica to F1 13, which means that Seb is left there to watch and twiddle his thumbs. She decides that Red Bull is the team she wants and seeing her crash into walls, and even Jenson, is nothing less than infuriating.

Eventually, he can take no more. Making up some half-hearted excuse, Seb flees the Button household before Mrs Button can even ask if he’s staying for dinner. In hindsight, he feels bad about just storming out (and especially ignoring Jenson’s mother) but he just didn’t see another viable option in that situation because he sure as hell wasn’t hanging around just to watch the happy couple bat their eyelashes at each other.

Seb doesn’t know why their relationship gets to him so much. There’s just something about it that feels wrong. He can’t put his finger on it but it’s the reason that he avoids Jenson for the next week.

 

Jenson decides to let his best friend be for a while. Seb obviously needed some time to adjust but a week was more than he was willing to offer. That week is the longest they’ve ever gone without speaking and the older boy is not going to let it go on any longer. He corners the younger boy as he’s coming out of English class so that he would have nowhere to run.

“Okay, I’m sick of this whole avoiding each other thing so we are going to talk about it; right here, right now,” Jenson says with determination before Seb even realises what’s happening.

Seb blinks twice, mouth slightly agape. He’s never seen his friend so serious. Usually he is the serious one and Jenson is the playful one. “Okay,” is all he can say in reply.

It’s far easier that the older of the two had imagined. “Right. So do you want to tell me why everything has gone so downhill between us lately? It’s never been like this.” Seb blushes but doesn’t answer. “I’ve been going over it all in my head again and again and I think I know what the problem is…”

“You do?”

Jenson nods, frowning slightly. “It all began when I started going out with Jessica. Everything was perfect up until then. Do you not like her? Is that what’s wrong?”

No, but it’s not like she ever intentionally did anything to piss him off. How can he tell his best friend that he doesn’t like his girlfriend ‘just because’? “She’s perfectly nice.”

“Then what the hell is wrong? There has to be something wrong because it’s obviously about her.”

Seb frowns. What exactly could he say? He couldn’t say that he felt that she was taking up all his time because he removed himself from the equation before it even got to that point. The younger of the two sighs wearily. “I honestly don’t know what’s wrong with me. But I do know that I really miss you. I especially miss kicking your ass on F1 13,” he adds with a smile.

The fact that Seb smiled causes Jenson to smile too. He punches him lightly on the arm. “McLaren are a team of integrity.”

“Yeah, sure. Whatever you say.”

“So does that mean that we’re good again?”

Sebastian nods, feeling like a huge weight has been lifted. “We’re most definitely good.”

“My house after school?”

“Most definitely.”

After that little tete a tete, their relationship is better than it ever has been before. Although Jenson makes a conscious decision to keep Seb and Jess separate from each other, splitting his time equally between the two. Anyway, everyone is happy so that’s all that matters.

Unfortunately, that is not actually the case.

It turns out that Jessica isn’t exactly happy with the situation. She wants Jenson to spend more time with her meaning less time with Seb. Time that he is not willing to give up having seen what it was like before. It’s not that he feels like he has to spend half his time with his best friend, it’s that he _wants_ to.

Things turn sour after one particular argument. It ends with Jessica storming out and declaring that, if Jenson likes being with Seb so much, he should be his girlfriend instead. It completely floors him. He knows that she just meant it to illustrate her point but it had a completely different meaning for him.

Jenson doesn’t tell his best friend the real reason that they broke up. Doesn’t feel the need to. Instead, he tells him that they just weren’t right for each other and that was that (he tries to ignore the look of relief on Seb’s face). Weeks go by and they go back to their usual routine of spending every day together. Things are different though.

They’re doing their homework on Seb’s bed one day when Jenson has an epiphany. The younger of the two is goofing off and Jenson realises that, if the situation had been reversed, he would have reacted twice as bad as Sebastian. He couldn’t imagine not spending every single day with him. It’s a somewhat frightening thought.

Two weeks later it happens.

Seb and Jenson are lying on the latter’s bed on a Friday night watching a movie with popcorn and chocolate and Jenson finally gets the picture. He ends up watching Seb instead of the movie which his best friend doesn’t really notice because he’s too busy laughing at every single joke of questionable humour. After a while, however, he does look up and frowns when he catches his best friend’s intense gaze upon him. Jenson’s lips are parted slightly as if he’s really contemplating something.

“What’s wrong?” the younger boy asks with a frown.

He doesn’t answer and instead throws caution to the wind, slowly closing the distance between their faces. Sebastian is so shocked that he doesn’t move and soon their lips meet. At first it’s all Jenson and he’s really worried that he’s completely gotten it wrong and ruined everything but then Seb returns the kiss and god is it good. Jenson immediately feels something that he never felt when he kissed Jessica because he already loved Seb before the thought of kissing him ever even entered his head.

Sebastian shuffles closer, still dazed from the fact that he was kissing Jenson, his best friend whom he has known practically all of his life. His arms end up wrapped around the other boy’s neck which only deepens the kiss. They shift somewhat awkwardly after a moment, trying to get a position with more leverage. It’s gentle yet passion filled at the same time. It’s completely bewildering yet a long time coming.

Jenson’s hand runs down Seb’s right side, burrowing under the small of his back. Heat is radiating through them and they both find it increasingly harder to breathe. Eventually, after a good four minutes or so, the older of the two pulls away, lungs burning from the lack of oxygen. The kiss was good, so much better than any he ever shared with a girl. He watches his best friend intently for a moment; Seb’s eyes are blissfully shut but his forehead is creased as if he’s struggling to ascertain if this is actually happening or not.

Jenson can’t help but smile. He decides to give the younger man a little help and places another kiss, feather light and brief this time, on his lips. He delights in the fact that they are still moist and glistening. “Open your eyes, Sebastian.”

Seb starts at the sound of the very familiar voice. He then realises that it’s actually been quite a while since he last heard it. His heart beat increases rapidly and he’s pretty sure that he’s having a heart attack. Notwithstanding all of that, the sixteen year old slowly opens his eyes, shying away into the pillow.

His friend(?) chuckles softly and places his index finger under Seb’s chin. Delicately, Jenson jerks his finger so that the younger boy’s gaze is in line with his once again. He sees a mixture of fear and longing in those impossibly blue orbs. “You don’t need to hide. This is me, remember. Just me.”

Seb inhales deeply yet unsteadily. All logic has truly gone out the window. He lets his feelings drive him. “Kiss me,” he demands.

Jenson arches an eyebrow and Seb wants to sigh and melt because _that_ is Jenson and he is so unbelievably perfect. “You kiss me,” the taller of the two challenges, knowing if Seb declines that he’s going to kiss him anyway. He still wants to have a little fun.

His best friend doesn’t have to be asked twice. Seb lunges forward and reattaches his lips to Jenson’s before the other boy even realises what’s happening. There’s an edge of ferocity to it that certainly wasn’t there the first time. This wasn’t the Seb that he was used to but it was definitely a welcome change.

Their tryst is cut unbearably short, however, when there is a knock on the door. Both boys pull away from each other with lightning speed and somehow Jenson ends up falling off the bed and crashes onto the (thankfully) carpeted floor. “Jenson? Seb? Are you boys hungry?” Sebastian can barely hear a word that his best friend’s mother is saying because of the fit of laughter that has overcome him. Eventually, however, after a rather disapproving if not amused from Jenson, he hops up and opens the door.

Mrs. Button arches an eyebrow when she catches sight of her only son clambering back to his feet and gingerly rubbing his head. “Are you okay, Jense? What happened?”

Seb pressed the back of his wrist against his lips to suppress even more laughter and Jenson glared at him. “I was asleep on the bed. The knock startled Seb and he pushed me off.”

“It was an accident!”

“Sure it was.” Sebastian is convinced that the older boy could make a career for himself as an actor as he handles the situation with coolness and nonchalance that he never thought physically possible after one has nearly been caught making out with one’s best friend. HHhHH

The beautiful blond woman rolls her eyes. She has pretty much seen it all before with these two boys. “We can order some pizza in, if you want? Seb, are you staying the night?”

Oh god. Seb thinks that that is _the_ worst idea that he has ever heard. Spending the night in the same room as Jenson would not be good for him or his sanity. “I’m sorry but I actually have to get going now.”

“Really?” only he would hear the undertone in Jenson’s voice that betrays what they had just been doing.

Seb nods, pulling on his shoes. He needs to get out of there as soon as possible. “Yeah, I promised my mom that I’d be home early enough. She’s complaining that she never sees me anymore.”

“I know the feeling,” Jenson’s mom chuckles, looking between the two teenagers. “Anyway, night, Seb. I’m sure we’ll be seeing you tomorrow?”

He chuckles. “I’d say the odds of that are good.”

“Jense? Hungry?”

Jenson eyes his friend for a moment. “No, I’m fine thank you.”

Satisfied with that answer, Jenson’s mother left the room leaving an air of awkwardness in her wake. “What’s the hurry?” the older of the two asked lowly, “You could have stayed if you want to. Your mother is at that Gala with your father…”

Sebastian bites his lip. He doesn’t want his best friend to get the impression that he is running away after what had just happened. He presses his lips gently against the other boys to reassure him. “I’m sorry. I just… I need to go home and think things through. I mean… this is just…”

Jenson has to admit that he understands where his friend was coming from. He just hopes that Seb doesn’t completely freak out. It’s confusing but it just feels right. “I know,” he says, rubbing his eye with the heel of his hand, “I get it. I guess I need some time to think too. Just don’t distance yourself like you did before, okay?”

He won’t. “Okay.”

“Promise?”

“Promise.”

 

Well that escalated quickly, Seb thinks to himself once he’s inside the safety of his own home. Thank god his parents aren’t there to see his little freak out. What the hell had actually just happened? They had been watching a movie like they always and suddenly they just weren’t. He can honestly say that he had never been as surprised in his life as when Jenson’s lips first pressed against his. It’s astounding yet makes complete sense at the same time. How close they are, Seb’s possessiveness of Jenson, his hatred for _her_ …

_I have fallen for my best friend_.

It’s the only conclusion that he can make and it makes perfect sense. What he feels for the older boy surpasses what the average person feels for their friend, he just hasn’t realised it before. Well, Sebastian is well aware of it now. His skin is practically still on fire from where Jenson’s hands had wandered over it not fifteen minutes ago. He can still feel the heat of his breath against his mouth. Seb groans as he feels his temperature rise once again. Jenson is really going to be the death of him.

With a peculiar sense of acceptance, Seb treks up the stairs. He is in dire need of a cold shower.

 

To say that it’s awkward when they meet up the next day is an understatement. That’s only natural when you realise you have romantic feelings for the guy you’ve been friends with for nearly twelve years- when you’ve shared everything; first crushes, first kisses, beds… It almost seems as if they had done everything backwards.

Eventually, Seb and Jenson come to the mutual understanding that it’s much better to act as if everything is normal instead of being unnaturally shy around each other. Realistically, nothing has changed. They’re still the same people, they still like the same things, it’s just now kissing each other has been added to their list of interests.

After that, everything is more or less perfect. They get to do the same things they always do, with some welcome additions of course. They quickly decide that the best part of dating your friend of twelve years is not the fact that they know each other inside out; it’s the fact that they can spend massive amounts of time together in their bedrooms without any suspicion from their parents. And boy do they make use of that time…

At first it’s pretty PG; making out, feeling up… but they are teenage boys after all. And they are way too sexually frustrated to just leave it there. So when Jenson stops kissing his best friend turned boyfriend one day and whispers in his ear that he would like to do something to make Seb feel r _eally_ good, the younger man merely nods, eyes wide with something that is a lot like terror. His heart feels like it’s going to explode it’s beating so fast as Jenson unbuttons and unzips his jeans. Seb quickly shuts his eyes and lies back on the bed- his bed that he has practically slept in since he was old enough to leave the cot- and waits anxiously as his boyfriend sticks his hand into his underwear and begins to stroke him. What’s even more embarrassing is the fact that Seb comes so quickly but he feels better when Jenson seems to love that.

So that becomes a… tradition of sorts for them. They try something new, it’s awkward and then it’s just not. And within a couple of months, there’s a _lot_ of things they don’t feel awkward about anymore!

They don’t tell their friends about the change in their relationship and, frankly, they don’t have to. They act as they always have done but those who really know them know that something has changed. It’s not something they talk about, it’s just a fact that’s more or less accepted. There’s no Jenson without Seb, no Seb without Jenson. It almost seems natural that they should be what they are to each other.

After the first time they have sex, Jenson suggests that maybe it’s time that they informed their parents of their relationship. He knows that if somehow they find out in some other way, that the fall out will be ever worse. If they’re honest, maybe it will be more likely to work in their favour? They both know it’s a huge step. Telling you parents that you’re gay is one thing. Telling them that you’re currently dating the boy that was practically like another son to them is whole other story. But Jenson knows that it’s a step they need to take.

And Seb goes along with it, even though he knows that his parents aren’t like Jenson’s. He goes along with it because he knows it’s what Jenson wants and he knows it will make him happy. But he also knows that his parents aren’t as unconditionally accepting as his boyfriend’s. Of course they love him, he’s their only son, but he never felt like he could talk to them the way Jenson talks to John or even his mother. And that was something that scared him though he wouldn’t dare admit that to his boyfriend.

In fact, Seb is quite jealous of the ductility of the relationship when they’re having dinner at Jenson’s one night and their son just comes out and says something along the lines of “By the way, we thought you might like to know that Seb and I have been dating for the past five months”. John nearly chokes on a carrot (Seb isn’t far behind him) and Simone drops her fork but other than that, there is no big reaction. There’s no shouting and they talk about it over dinner like mature adults. The younger of the two is completely shocked by the time they head upstairs after dinner and John playfully calls after them to tell them to keep the door open from now on.

Having Jenson’s parents out of the way gives Sebastian some confidence although he still insists that he tell his parents about them by himself. He doesn’t see how his parents wouldn’t be supportive after witnessing how John and Simone treated Jenson- and Seb by extension- as if absolutely nothing had changed.

Unfortunately, it doesn’t go as well as he had planned. His father doesn’t seem to want to accept that his only son is gay and his mother ended up in tears but there’s no shouting and they don’t ban him from seeing Jenson which, of course, is a major plus. There doesn’t seem like a solid resolution, however, and Seb goes to bed that night feeling more or less dissatisfied as well as a little bit suspicious. It doesn’t feel right that they would try to convince him that he was just extremely confused and let things be as they did but he tries not to dwell too much on it.

The Buttons invite the Vettels over for dinner the following week so they can have a bit of a tete a tete about the whole situation. It seems, however, that Jenson’s parents do most of the talking and Seb’s merely smile politely and nod. Seb has never felt so self-conscious in his life because it is clear to everyone present that they aren’t exactly happy at the situation. They barely stay for dessert (which is a Black Forrest Gateau to show the Vettels that they were making that extra effort) and neither of his parents speak to him for the night when he gives Jenson a brief kiss goodnight when they’re leaving.

But Seb is sure that they just need time to get used to the situation. Everyone is different and his parents probably just needed more time to get their heads around the fact that Seb was in fact gay. So he kept waiting and waiting in hope for the day when they would smile and tell him that everything was okay…

But that day didn’t come.

Instead, he came home from football one day to find his mother and father waiting for him in the sitting room, very serious expressions on both of their faces. Seb immediately knew that whatever conversation they wanted to have was not going to end well for anyone, mainly him.

“Sebastian, sit down.”

Dropping his gear bag next to the door, he makes his way over to the armchair his father had gestured to like a man on death row. He doesn’t want to; he just wants to run away and not hear whatever they have to say but he can’t. So he just sits there quietly as his mother tears his world completely apart.

“Your father has been offered a new job in Milton Keynes. We’re moving in two weeks.”

Just like that. There’s no sugar coating or even consideration of how he might feel about it. It’s just a statement, plain and simple and, most importantly, final. But that doesn’t mean that Seb doesn’t try everything he can think of and more to change their minds. He shouts, he cries, he threatens to run away but neither his mother nor his father even bats an eye at his protestations. So he cries and screams some more that this is just their way of punishing him and that he hates them. The worst part is they make half-assed excuses about the whole thing and that it wasn’t about his little ‘rebellion’ which he doesn’t believe for a second.

So instead of going upstairs to shower before dinner like he usually would on a Tuesday, he leaves the house- slamming the door enough to crack the decorative glass window in the middle- and practically runs to Jenson’s house, tears flowing down his cheeks all the way there.

It’s not Jenson that opens the door after he rings the doorbell several times, it’s Jenson’s mom and she gasps at the sight of the usually happy teenager in bits right before her. “Seb? What’s the matter?”

Seb can’t answer that question. He can’t put what’s happening into words for fear of it actually being true so he just shakes his head, continues to cry and melts into Simone’s embrace when she pulls him into a hug and assures him that everything is going to be okay. “Jenson! Get down here!” she calls up the stairs once the front door is closed.

Jenson comes to the top of the stairs, giving out about being in the middle of something but quickly stops in his tracks when he takes in the scene a few feet below him. Seb crying- inconsolable- and clinging to his mother for dear life. She has a horrified expression on her face that pretty mirrors his and her white top is already soaked in tears.

So Jenson hurries down the stairs, a million reasons for why Seb would be crying like that running through his head (none of them good). Seb detached for his boyfriend’s mother and moves instantly into Jenson’s arms and the taller boy squeezes him as tightly as physically possible without hurting him. “Hey, what’s wrong? Tell me what’s wrong…”

Once again, Seb shakes his head becoming even more inconsolable if that’s even possible. “J-Jenson,” he barely manages to get the word out, now clinging to his boyfriend so tightly that his knuckles are white and his finger nails are cutting into Jenson’s skin.

But Jenson doesn’t care about that. He’s too overcome with shock and heartbreak for Sebastian that he can do nothing but whisper ‘soothing’ things like ‘it’s okay’ or ‘you’re fine’ and he feels absolutely pathetic. He looks at his mother once again, begging her to tell him what to do- what he _can_ do to make it any bit better. Simone just shakes her head and points towards the stairs. Jenson gets the picture. “Let’s go upstairs…”

Seb seems to think that’s a good idea and Jenson wraps his arm around his boyfriend’s waist, holding him steady as they head up to his room. The usual tension that’s there when they’re in either of their rooms is completely gone and Simone doesn’t even bother telling him to keep the door open.

It takes him ten or fifteen minutes of cuddling on the bed for Seb to manage to explain what is going on. Jenson understands immediately; what’s going on, what the motives are, why they won’t change his parents’ minds… And he cries, right along with his boyfriend. Because it’s not fair. Because they’ve been friends for nearly twelve years. Because it can’t happen, it just can’t. They can’t be apart, especially not now.

And Jenson can’t help but blame himself. If they had just kept their relationship to themselves. If that had been enough. If they hadn’t wanted so much. But the ‘if’ is the most maddening part of it all because they can’t take it back, no matter what. They could ‘break-up’ but Seb’s parents would see right through that unless they stopped talking to each other altogether. And even so, he doubted Seb’s parents would change their mind.

“But it’s not like I’m not going to be gay anywhere else!”

“I know but they probably just think that you’re mistaking our friendship for something else…”

“That’s stupid! Friend’s don’t feel like this about each other! Friends don’t kiss or give each other blowjobs or fuck each other and feel like it’s the best feeling in the world!”

“I _know,_ Seb, I know! But you have to convince t _hem._ ”

Suddenly something occurs to Seb and it makes his blood run completely cold. It suddenly all makes sense. “They either think that I’m not actually gay and will get over it once we’re apart, or…”

Jenson frowns. “Or?”

There’s nothing Seb can do but sigh. “Or they think I do love you and won’t get over you so they won’t have to worry.” _Either way, I’ve already lost._

 

And lose they did.

Two weeks later, as planned and despite Seb, Jenson and even John and Simone trying everything they can think of to stop it, the Vettels move to Milton Keynes. And for the first time in twelve years, the two boys are separated. It hurts more than either could even imagine. Jenson goes to their house, which has been completely emptied, to say goodbye. He doesn’t even care what Seb’s parents will say because he is not going to miss his opportunity to say goodbye to the love of his life just because it makes them uncomfortable.

So he kisses Seb right before the younger of the two gets into the car for the whole world to see. He doesn’t care who knows, none of that seems important given the situation. Jenson just cannot understand how parents could willingly and knowingly hurt their child so much, just because he didn’t turn out the way they had expected or wanted.

They whisper goodbyes with promises to call each other or text each other every day and, not a minute later, Seb is gone, leaving him all alone for the first time in as long as he can remember.

They don’t call like they said they would.

At first they’re both hurting too much to do anything but cry and lock themselves away, eating only occasionally. Eventually the texts die out too as they remind them too much of what they’ve lost. The love is still completely there, showing it just becomes impossible. So they stop talking and try to get back to their lives as best as they know how which Jenson finds nearly impossible. All his friends were once shared with Seb and none of them treat him the same anymore. Not because they care about his sexuality but because they know what he’s lost.

The next communication between the two of them comes the day of Jenson’s graduation. It’s nothing exceptional but it sets his healing back four months.

_Congratulations. I love you._

Jenson cries when he reads it, just like he’s sure Seb did when he wrote it.

_Thanks. I love you; always have, always will._

 

And those are the last words they say to each other. They both go to college and Seb moves on enough to have another boyfriend, Kimi (he stops talking to his parents the minute he moves into his college dorm) but it’s nothing like his relationship with Jenson ever was. There aren’t much feelings involved and Seb is convinced he’ll never feel anything close to what he felt with Jenson.

Jenson is more or less the same. He eventually becomes his old easy going self once again but it takes a long time. He takes to sleeping with anyone he meets at a bar or a club to make some of the hurt go away but it turns him into someone he doesn’t even recognise.

Yes, those are the last words they say to each other….

For four years that is anyway.

 It’s funny how life works. It’s funny that Seb, armed with a degree in Mechanical Engineering, should decide to do a masters in University College London. It’s funny that Jenson has gotten his degree in Business and Commerce from UCL and is also starting his masters. It’s funny that they run into each other on the third day of the term in a park just off campus.

Seb’s sitting on a wall next to the grass, legs crossed and cup of Starbucks coffee perched beside him, flicking through the obnoxiously big text book that he was meant to find the material he needs to write his first essay of the semester in.

It’s Jenson that spots him. At first he thinks his eyes are deceiving him or that it’s just someone who resembles his ex-boyfriend and friend but the longer he watches, the more convinced he becomes that it’s actually Seb. He would know that look anywhere, the pure concentration and little line that forms between the younger man’s eyes, the way his mouths the words but no sound escapes his mouth… It’s Seb, he knows that for sure.

Jenson just stands there for some amount of time. It could be seconds, minutes or hours (it feels like hours). So many old feelings are stirred up once again at the sight of him that Jenson doesn’t know whether to laugh, cry or just be incredibly thankful. He’s always contemplated what it would be like to see Seb once again and now that it was actually happening, he could hardly believe it.

So with a massive, yet somewhat wary, smile on his face, Jenson decides he’s been looking like a stalker for too long and makes his way over to where Seb is sitting. _What do I say? Hi? No, we haven’t seen each other in nearly five years, that’s pathetic. Well, I’m going to have to say something because he’s right in front of me. God, he’s right in front of me!_

“Seb?”

He jumps at the sound of his name being spoken by a familiar voice, something unknown fluttering in his stomach. Seb looks up and his jaw falls completely agape when his eyes fall on Jenson’s grinning face. _No…_ The reaction comes completely naturally. “Jenson!” tossing his textbook to the side, knocking over his coffee in the process, Seb springs to his feet and envelops his ex-boyfriend in a bone crushing hug.

This time Jenson actually does laugh and squeezes back with just as much pressure, relishing the feeling of having Seb near once again. It’s completely surreal, like this is all a dream or something but yet he knows that it’s real and Seb is actually there in his arms once again. He feels this extreme swell of emotion from the younger man. “Hi. Wow… I just… wow. How are you?”

_Amazing now that I finally get to see you again._ “Great. I’m just… so unbelievably happy to see you again!”

Jenson chuckles and it’s the most important sound that Seb has ever heard. “Me too! I-“ _You can’t say that._ “I’m just shocked! You’re going to school here?”

“Yeah,” Seb takes a step back so that he can see just how much Jenson has changed, and he has changed. He looks a lot older but still has a boyish look about him. His eyes are bright blue and sparkling like they always did. His hair is a bit longer and he now wears blond scruff on his jaw. He looks more perfect than ever. So perfect that it almost hurts Sebastian. “I’m doing my masters in Mechanical Engineering.”

The other man’s face lights up at that. “Me too! Well, not mechanical engineering, business. What are the odds?”

_Phenomenal seeing as they were never really in our favour. But you’re here, I can’t believe you’re here!_ Seb laughs almost manically and shakes his head. “I’m sorry, I just can’t believe this is actually happening. It’s been-“

“Nearly five years. I remember. Though I couldn’t exactly forget if I tried.”

It’s hard to ignore the emotion in Jenson’s voice and it sends a stab of pain through him. _I know the feeling._ “A long time…”

And once again a wry smile is plastered on the taller man’s face. “And you haven’t changed a bit,” Jenson says with a glint in his eye and nudges Seb’s arm. That’s not exactly true. Sure, Sebastian probably looks more like his seventeen year old self than him but he’s also grown up a lot. He’s quite a few inches taller and a lot more muscular than the last time they saw each other. His face looks older, more experienced and his blonde hair that used to be floppy is close at the sides and longer (and blonder) on top. But regardless of the changes, it’s still his Seb.

“Shut up, yes I have! I’m not short anymore! I’m nearly as tall as you!”

He scoffs. “Keep dreaming. I-“

“There you are!” An oh-too-familiar voice cuts him off, as a pair of arms are wrapped around his waist.

Seb feels his heart shatter into a million pieces when he lays on the gorgeous blond man whose arms are draped around Jenson like it was the most natural thing in the world. He doesn’t need to be told who he is when he sees the guilty expression on his ex-boyfriend’s face. _Thanks for reminding me what it feels like to be heart broken._ Though he looks calm on the outside, Seb is struggling to breathe as it occurs to him that Jenson is not really _his_ Jenson anymore.

“Yeah. Sorry, I should introduce you. Nico, this is Seb. We’ve been friends since what? Pre-school? Seb, this is Nico-“

“His boyfriend,” the (also) blond German grins and shakes Seb’s hand.

He has to fight the urge to grimace. _Wow, Jense… you really have a type, don’t you?_ “Nice to meet you.”

“You too. Jense, I’ve got a lecture in ten so I have to get going now. Are you coming with or…?”

Jenson looks between his current boyfriend and ex-boyfriend for a moment, contemplating how he should answer that question. He wants to stay with Seb but…

In the end, Sebastian makes the decision for him. “Yeah, you should go. I have to get this essay that I should have started the first day back done. We can catch up some other time. Coffee maybe?”

Jenson smiles at his former best friend but it isn’t nearly as vibrant as before. He hates himself when he sees that Sebastian is trying his best to be strong, knowing that if the roles were reversed, he would be completely devastated. And he is. But Jenson knows that it’s worse for Seb. “Yeah. You still have my number, right?”

“You haven’t changed it?”

Jenson shakes his head, a small knowing smile on his face. “Thought it would be best to keep it.”

_The same reason I haven’t changed mine._ “I’ll text you.”

He pulls Seb into another hug, lingering just a bit too long for Nico not to notice how Seb’s eyes squeeze shut and Jenson melts into the contact. “I still can’t believe you’re here.”

_That makes two of us. Please don’t let go… I need to stay like this with you._ Too quickly the embrace is over and Seb is left feeling like someone has ripped away part of him again. “Neither can I.” It’s almost like a cruel joke. Seb definitely thinks that there is someone somewhere laughing at his misfortunes. After five years, the love of his life- his soul mate, his reason for existence- is standing there right in front of him and they still can’t be together, he still can’t just reach out and kiss him and undo all of the hurt.

“We better go,” Nico tells his boyfriend and takes his hand, pretending not to notice how Seb flinches.

Jenson frowns for a moment, suddenly remembering himself. “Yeah. Don’t forget to text, okay? Or I’ll have to hunt you down,” he warns playfully, pointing a finger at his ex-boyfriend and completely resisting the urge to grab hold of him and never let go again.

Seb smiles at that, genuinely smiles. “I won’t.”

As he watches Jenson and _Nico_ walk away all the soul destroying disappointment that he was feeling disappeared. It was replaced by something else entirely…

Because Seb doesn’t believe in coincidences, especially not ones as big as this. There they are; in the same city, going to the same university, near each other once again; and he just knows that’s too big to ignore. Not with their history. So Seb will text Jenson, and they will get coffee and catch up. And maybe then it will turn into something more once again, because that was always the way it was meant to turn out, wasn’t it? Jenson and Seb, Seb and Jenson. Names once synonymous with each other and hopefully would be once again.

So he watches Nico drape himself all over Jenson before his current boyfriend casts a glance back at Seb. There’s a smile on Nico’s face but Seb can tell it for what it really is: a warning. _He’s mine._

It’s in that moment that he makes a plan, a plan to get Jenson back once and for all. He’s going to remind his once best friend and boyfriend what made them fall in love in the first place. Because love the love that they had doesn’t just go away; not when it once ran so deep… not when he stills feels it every single day of the week, week of the month, month of the year…

And he won’t feel bad at all for taking Jenson from Nico

Because all’s fair in love and war.


End file.
